A Slower Pace

This morning I woke up early so I could make breakfast for my wife. I have the next few days off work to enjoy our company, my wife’s birthday, and Father’s Day. I stayed up late last night to make a vacation picture collage as a present (along with the stuff the kids and I bought her). We have a wall with picture collages of all of our family vacations. We still hadn’t done one for our 2004 vacation which so far has been our favorite. I wish I could have done it with the kids but with me working I never have time alone with them without my wife being around. So a late night creative arrangement was the answer — without kids unfortunately.

My son had his second T-ball practice last night. He did much better than his first practice but I will need to get out in the yard to practice with him. I am just waiting for my back to get better before I get into full speed mode again.

With my folks here, I spent some time with my dad last night showing him how to use the zero turn riding mower. It really is fun once you pick up the hang of it. And after a few minutes of him learning not to correct his overcorrections, he began to get the gist of it. It was cool to see the engineer side of him slowly pick up the operations of how it maneuvered and operated.

A Cincinnati trip for birthday lunch at the Cheesecake Factory is on order today. It is my wife’s favorite restaurant and grandma and grandpa will be babysitting. An then this evening, the electrician is showing up to finalize the electrical for the pool pump and motor. Then all I have to do is the chemicals and we are ready to swim. The kids are chomping at the bit since it was installed early last week. Patience, young Jedi warrior. Patience.

…..Dan at aslowerpace dot net

Today was my middle daughter’s birthday. We woke her up with breakfast decorations and a candle in her cinnamon roll. At lunch, the whole family came down to meet me. We went to our good ol’ family favorite — Smokey Bones. We had a nice birthday lunch meal and I enjoyed spending a weekday lunch together. Back in Thousand Oaks I used to see all of the family for lunch everyday when I came home. I sure miss that. However, now that it is summer I am hoping we can take advantage of the opportunities when my wife can bring everyone down for lunch.

Pizza Hut, my daughter’s favorite, was on order for dinner. After that, we all killed time until the fireflies came out. At that point we all got together on the front porch for about 45 minutes. My son ran into his room to get his bug catcher net and my wife grabber a clear jar. The kids all took turns “catch and releasing” fireflies. It was very relaxing and entertaining as my wife and I sat next to each other watching the kids and their excitement. Another country memory filed away in my memory banks.

…..Dan at aslowerpace dot net

Wow! I don’t know where to start. It is late — I just finished watching the NASCAR All-Star race and am reflecting on the day. For me, it was picture perfect.

It started with our last soccer game. I picked up my son’s soccer pictures and they looked great. I ordered some of those trading cards to send to family along with a button to match all the ones of my daughters that we have on the sun visor in my wife’s truck. The kids played a great game…..and we didn’t lose! We didn’t win either but I’ll take a tie over the losses we’ve had this year. I’m kinda bummed because they were just getting the hang of it — scoring goals, playing defense, attacking the ball. At least we ended on a high note and were getting better.

With that checked off our busy day list, my son and I ran into town to pick up some wine for tonight’s company. While driving down the freeway, I spotted a truck on the side of the road with a father and daughter waiting for something. I was in the slow lane and in a position to quickly pull over and stop. I offered help. They told me that she had a soccer game 30 minutes away that they were late for. Their wife/mom had surgery the night before and they spent a little too much time at the hospital this morning. They were running late and pushed their gas too far and had run out. But they had called someone on the team who was on their way. Within that time, that person showed up with the needed fuel and we left them in good hands.

A quick trip to the store for some nice wine and we were back home to help get everything ready for tonight’s dinner. I started the coals for the smoker and began prepping the two chickens. Once they were happy together with the hot coals and wet hickory wood smoking away, I was able to begin straightening up the back yard and garage. My wife already had the house clean and the kids were being good staying out of the way and not undoing all of our hard work. We were ahead of the curve with everything ready and the meal on it’s way to being enjoyed so my wife and I sat on the back patio for a while and just relaxed and talked. The weather was perfect today and we soaked it all in.

Our company arrived and we truly had a great time. Good food, good company and good chatting. We were able to visit, eat some good food and share some stories. We took a little hike around the property and my kids loved playing with their older daughter. I’m sure glad we could reciprocate and say thank you to them for all they had done.

After dinner and after our company had left, my son ran over to the neighbor’s house to play with his little buddy. Upon retrieving him later in the evening, I brought my neighbor’s favorite beer to him and we chatted for about 1/2 hour while the boys continued to play. The fireflies coming out was my cue to head home and say goodbye. Later that night, I actually caught one in my hands. I put it in a glass jar and took it inside to show they kids…..but they were all asleep. And so ends our great day.

…..Dan at aslowerpace dot net

Note to readers, the first part of this posting is done by Mrs. Aslowerpace in honor of Mother’s Day.

Last week after Church I went shopping and came home with two new dresses. I came in and gave Hubby a kiss and thanked him for my Mother’s Day gift. I figured I got what I wanted and he didn’t have to worry about it now.

Today I slept until 7:00! For someone who is up every day at 5:00 am, that is sleeping in for me. I was greeted by my husband and daughters who made coffee for me. Our son who made his usual way to our bed at 3:00 am is sleeping beside me. As I read my homemade cards, he wakes up. He said he has a very special Mother’s Day present for me and leaves the room. While I drink my coffee and wait for my breakfast in bed to arrive, My son returns with a huge smile. He says he has brushed his teeth for me. You see normally it’s like pulling teeth to get him to brush his teeth. I tell him I am very happy and he says there is more. He returns dressed for Church (and it’s not his army shorts) and drags me out of bed to show me that he has cleaned his room (OK so he shoved the toys in the closet, but it still counts). Happy Mother’s Day to me! Dan and the girls arrive with my breakfast. Both girls are dressed and are also ready for Church. There has been no fighting, whining or yelling this morning. This, along with my homemade gifts, are my Mother’s Day gift. It’s the little simple things in life that count. Not the two dresses I bought for myself. It was my son being proud of himself. It is the spark in both my daughter’s faces as I tear when I read the cards they have made for me. It is my husband who made breakfast and did the dishes for me. These “things” which are not material things have made this Mother’s Day special. My Mom was taken from me when I was too young and I always wished I could make her that special card or picture. I hope all the Moms who receive these special gifts from their children appreciate and cherish them. You can always buy a dress — soon your children will be going to Hallmark for the card and it’s just not the same!

Happy Mother’s Day!

…..Dan at aslowerpace dot net

This evening we had our second soccer practice for 4-6 year old bee hive soccer (if you’ve ever watched a little kid’s soccer game you know what I mean). The games on Tuesday and Saturday were unfortunately rained out. It was good to see the kids again and even better that all the names I remembered still stuck in my brain. I make a huge effort to know the kids’ names at the first practice. I tell the parents that I might never know their names (other than they are the parents of “Johnny”) but since we are here for the kids that I’ll get their names straight.

At the end of practice, we had a short scrimmage against the other team that was practicing. What was most exciting was seeing how different players developed or reacted in a game situation…..which is complete chaos with 20 little, unlimited energy machines driving legs and arms chasing this black and white geoshaped ball randomly. I was very excited when one of my little guys scored his first goal. This is a kid who hadn’t played before and doesn’t even come to practice with his own ball or cleats. He just gets into the fray and kicks the ball free with such determination that he had an opportunity to kick it into the goal on the other side. I had him give me a high five and made a special fuss in front of his parents at the end of the practice. He was beaming and I wanted that moment to be special for him. I hope I get that opportunity with each of my players — the feeling of achieving something special and being recognized for it. My philosophy at this age level is to make it an overall enjoyable experience and lots of fun. At this age, that is the only way to get them to return next year. If I can sneak in a soccer skill here or there (such as a throw in technique or stopping the ball with a “bug stop” — i.e. stepping on the ball), I will. However, the big picture is what is more important — them learning how to be part of a team and having fun playing sports.

As I said in my post title, “what a kick”. The first game is tomorrow and I hope to have more positive moments with these kids.

…..Dan at aslowerpace dot net

As most of you know from reading this blog, Sundays are our God and family days. Well, not today — or at least that not how it seems. The kids woke up cranky and we were in some kind of funk. Church wasn’t an option today though because it was a youth involved service we were looking forward to. In addition, my oldest daughter is going to be involved in the service on Mother’s Day next week and will be carrying the crucifix. She needs to go to Sunday school this week to familiarize herself with the ritual and get comfortable with it all.

So I told my wife to go with my oldest daughter and I would stay at home with the young ‘ens. That way she could also go into town afterwards like she had planned. I don’t think the idea took that well until my son woke up complaining about the breakfast menu.

The two oldest ladies were off to church and I started in on my day. The list included getting the smoker prepped for our dinner, mowing the front lawn (an hour and half job), changing the oil in my wife’s truck that just left and is now at 200F degrees, and cleaning out my truck from the planting work of yesterday. I enlisted my son’s help in getting the smoker going. I stuck to my guns and didn’t make him pancakes like he wanted (long story — Mommy makes pancakes for the whole family, not just one person and Sundays usually aren’t pancake days because of the time constraints. Aren’t you glad you asked?). Instead he gobbled down a waffle of the frozen toaster variety (you’re talkin’ Dad here, not a gourmet chef) and joined me on the back patio.

I had planned this meal a few days ago so my charcoal and wood chip supplies were plentiful. I got my son going on filling the wheelbarrow with water (for soaking the wood chips) and I cleaned out the water bowl, grates and filled the charcoal recepticle. Soon we were “blasting off” — the whoosh of the freshly squirted lighter fluid inspiring awe in my son’s eyes. I only hope I instilled some respect of fire when I told him “Only Daddy does this part. You can get a very big owey.”. Soon the baby back rips properly seasoned were on their way to culinary enjoyment.

While prepping the ribs, I was actually able to enjoy both my middle daughter and son play together with the fridge magnet in the kitchen. Of course, while I was out actually putting the ribs on the smoker they were not properly referreed and got into a spat. Given that it was still early and this was round 2 (or 3 or 4), I put them both in their rooms for 1/2 hour. At which time my wife calls to thank me for letting them go off to church alone for some quiet time. All in a day’s work, right?

Well, 1/2 hour is up, I am checking off items on my list, so I have the kids come out to the front yard with me while I mow. I would continually check the corner of my eye, but all body language from them (they were about 100-200 feet away) indicated they were still cooperating and playing well together. Of course this was difficult to determine with my earplugs in and mowing sideways to them. But all in all it looked good. Kinda like how my lawn was slowly appearing as I removed swipe by swipe of tall grass to reveal a smooth green carpet below.

Ribs on the smoker, front lawn mowed, fountain pump installed (a quick win) and it was now time to turn on the NASCAR race. My wife wasn’t home yet and a lot was done…..with the kids, or 2/3 of them anyways. I deserved some R & R. Talladega was the answer. When my wife got home, her words were “Is that thing on?” — referring to the race. She then told me the little story of the sermon given by the youth pastor (remember? it was youth Sunday) entitled “Hide and Seek”. She felt it was written just for her where there are times when you don’t feel God is close to you (as in when the kids were fighting this morning and we were in a funk) but then He pops out to reveal Himself to you (the first radio song on the way to church was Martina McBride’s “Blessed” — lyrics covered here in this post — followed by the beautiful hot air balloon race that ended right by church with over two dozen balloons looking for a place to touch down). The church message was perfectly timed and enjoyed.

I balanced the next few hours with the NASCAR race at Talledaga, letting my wife’s motor cool down so I could change the oil and instructing my son on the finer points of watching a NASCAR race. He sat down with me the entire race. Of course, he snuck in a few hour nap. I enjoyed my driver dominating and leading the most laps. A huge wreck extended the ordeal. My wife couldn’t believe how long it was going and added to her previous comment — “Is that thing STILL on?”. I pulled the ribs off during another red flag crash and we chowed on dinner with the race still on. I finally enjoyed my driver taking the checker flag which released me to go work on the rest of my list (after driver interviews of course).

A quick oil change to my wife’s truck led me to my truck. I was going to begin cleaning it out when my wife and kids joined me. They all took over while I could go for extra credit — the back lawn. With the property requiring almost 5 hours of mowing, I have tried an alternative philosophy of doing the front pasture (1 1/2 hours) on one weeknight, the front lawn (1 1/2 hours) on another weeknight and the back lawn (1 1/2 hours) on another weeknight. This leaves the weekend whole but does not neglect the love and care needed by the grass. Last week’s rain didn’t allow me to test my weeknight mowing theory so I was a little behind. So extra credit for mowing the back seemed appropriate. Of course, halfway through required a trip to WalMart for gas. This bumped me up against the light limits because I didn’t get back until 8:20pm. I had just started contemplating the headlight option for the mower when I took my last swipe. By the time I got it airblown off, parked and in the garage, the clock read 9:18pm. My son was enjoying a DVD and my wife was almost asleep (remember that long nap during the race?). He wasn’t going to bed anytime soon so I grabbed the paper for some wind down time to keep him company.

Wow, quite a long posting for no philosophical insights, political rantings, or interesting thoughts (Sunday sermon speak excluded). I guess this post just gives you a regular, ordinary snapshot into a weekend day here. Maybe that’s what the transformation to Kentucky has become. It is no longer this test of turbulent, new waters but a slowly revealing look into our adaptation to scenery that is now more familiar to us.

…..Dan at aslowerpace dot net

While we didn’t get the expected storm last night or today, it did rain up until this morning. Everything is wet and the skies are grey. Although by the end of the day the sun started to take command. Tomorrow should be nicer with a spring-like week owning the greater part of the days.

I took advantage of the soft soil and lower temps to do quite a bit of planting today. I started off the morning with a red bud tree that has beautiful purple flowers and foliage in the spring. These trees stick out like purple sore thumbs in the forests of green everywhere. I then moved to the front entryway out by the mailbox. A burning bush and forsynthia on each side will give seasonal color as you come onto the property. A trip to WalMart with my son gave us the needed planting soil and mulch to finish the job. When we returned, we planted the kids’ fruit trees – one for each of them; a pear, a yellow apple and a red apple. Each child helped me plant their tree and I hope that in 10 or 20 years they can pick some fruit and remenisce on this day to when the tree was smaller than them. Even better will be when they bring their children to pick from “their” tree. These trees are very long term investments — a nice metaphor for some other priorities we have in life: faith, marriage, children, education.

…..Dan at aslowerpace dot net

My oldest daughter had to work on a school project at a friend’s house so we went into town to pick her up. Dark clouds were rolling in from the west and you could see the rain bands falling in the distance. As we drove home, the coulds were upon us darkening everything up. But you could see clear, blue sky on the horizon. Rain began to fall and the clouds began their exit to the east with the sun setting in the west. One of the kids then pointed out the rainbow. It was so spectacular that we pulled over to watch it unfold. We had a good view east towards the dark clouds with a command over the whole horizon. With the setting sun behind us to the west, a huge full half circle rainbow was revealed in a most amazing fashion. I drove slowly in a little circle in the dirt parking lot so everyone could have a full view (I’ve had pilots do that in the air over the Grand Canyon). What a special family moment. I told the kids that I was happy that I could share the biggest rainbow I had ever seen with them. And then it slowly faded away only to be real in our memories.

…..Dan at aslowerpace dot net

Today was my oldest daughter’s first communion day at church. It was a very nice service. An added touch was after each child received their first communion from the pastor, they would then turn around and give communion to their family who were standing behind them in a public show of support. It was a very special gesture and it was one more of these milestones that will choke me up on her way to adulthood. I am intent on focusing on these moments because I believe that in today’s day and age, they whiz by us too fast. I would equate a child’s life to a drag race. The anticipation on the line for the arrival is enough to make you go crazy. Then the green light and the race is on. The first few hundred feet while you are still accelerating are still captured in your memory. Their first crawl, first step, first words, first day of school. Sometimes those things can’t come fast enough. Then all those moments accumulate and become compressed in time as you careen down the track of life, accelerating as you go. Finally, before you know it the race is over, you begin slowing down and you can reflect back on what you thought you saw and the little that you captured. I am trading my dragster for a moped. It doesn’t look cool and it sure isn’t fast but it will get me there and ensure I don’t miss out on the beautiful scenery.

More notes for our wondrous day — in celebration, I fired up the BBQ smoker and added some more baby back rib experience to my BBQ knowledge. They turned out very good and we had a nice celebratory meal. While tending to the smoker, I was also able to enjoy the NASCAR race (although my driver was involved in the lap #1 wreck and never recovered) and a few of the NCAA tournament games, all in hi def of course. And U of L easily defeated Georgia Tech to make it to the Sweet 16. That will make things interesting for all of those fans here in the area. And finally, I got a little dirty changing the oil in the trucks and doing some needed preventative maintenance while the kids rode the scooter in the garage and played with the dogs. When the weather turns, a priority is getting a TV in the garage because there is nothing like having a race or game on while you are out there tinkering. All in all, a nice and productive day at home with the family. The big orange ball descending through the trees topped it off. It was so beautiful I had to come inside and tell my wife to look out the window.

…..Dan at aslowerpace dot net

Today I had spend the day at home from work taking care of my wife. She slipped on some black ice at the post office yesterday and landed flat on her back. She described it as a “Fred Flintstone fall”. You know the kind where you land on your back. She also hit her head and was pretty banged up. Luckily, she is just in pain, no major injuries. She woke up this morning feeling “like she got run over by a truck”. She needs some rest and that’s where I come in.

I took the girls to school this morning swapping my familiar two lane country drive with a busier main drag route. My son doesn’t go to pre-school on Tues or Thurs so it was my job to occupy his time and keep him quiet so mama could get some rest. This was the silver lining part. It fit in perfectly to our new self imposed directive to a slower pace and enjoy the time with loved ones.

We played a few games together — Don’t Break the Ice and Hi Ho Cherry O — practiced his alphabet and spelling, played soccer with the dogs out back and took a short hike while getting the mail. It was nice to just spend some time with him out in the sun (even though it was only 47F) with the birds singing and dogs running around. I could have propped him in front of a DVD and worked on a project (like I have been guilty of in the old days) but it felt really good and deeply rewarding. And most importantly, it allowed my wife a break that she needed to just rest and heal up. Tomorrow she will ease back into her world of chef, taxi and mom.

Another funny observation — all the snow and ice we received Sunday night (that my wife slipped on) was gone by Monday afternoon. We also awoke Saturday morning to a white countryside which melted later that afternoon. I really like the snow here. It shows up, you get to enjoy it fall and blanket everything, play in it for a while and then it goes away. Other than the week-long snow we had a Christmas, it snows here but doesn’t hang around long.

…..Dan at aslowerpace dot net