A Slower Pace

On our way home from a celebratory dinner last night, we saw two calves running through a field. My two daughter’s responses were:

“Awwwww. Little cows.”

“They’re so cute.”

However, my son’s response cracked me up. He said:

“Where’s my steak knife?”

…..Dan at aslowerpace dot net

This is a pretty funny story — but you’re gonna have to do some linking to get the full effect.

First, go here — http://llamabutchers.mu.nu/archives/164253.php

UPDATE: seems that link might not work — try this…..

It’s a pretty funny utilization of Flash animation — the theme song to “The Llama Butchers” blog.

Anyway, I played it for the kids…..for about a half hour. It’s an addictive tune that sticks in your head like one of those annoying songs that once it gets in there replays through your mind the rest of the day. The liked the high pitched voice, the random lyrics and pictures and the funny duck. Again, go to the link, watch the animation and listen to the tune — this’ll all make more sense.

So I’m at work today and I get a cell phone call from the wife. She took the kids, her sis-in-law and niece to the Louisville Zoo. It seems that they have llamas there so the kids all started singing the song. Then they noticed the pond in the pen…..AND IT HAD DUCKS IN IT! They were so excited and were yelling “LLAMA, LLAMA, DUCK!!!!!”.

It made for a nice break to my conference call. I laughed.

…..Dan at aslowerpace dot com

I came across this and it is appropriate since today is Sunday.

That’s a good kid and that’s a cool dog!

…..Dan at aslowerpace

I am writing a Saturday post on Sunday. We had a busy day going up to Cinci for a Costco run (we received our annual Costco AMEX rebate check and had to dispose of it at Costco), had a great BBQ lunch at Famous Dave’s BBQ and returned home with time to enjoy each other playing the driving game (Sega Dreamcast), reading and getting to bed early.

A freeway sign on the way up to Cinci made me laugh again. I saw it last week when we went up to the aquarium and meant to make a post on it. Anyway, it made me laugh again. It was identifying the exit for one of the state parks. Let’s see if you can figure out which one made me laugh.

– Daniel Boone State Park
– Bluegrasss Park
– Big Bone Lick State Park
– Tom Sawyer Park

I’ll get my mind out of the gutter but I will still laugh whenever I see it. Who comes up with these names anyway?

…..Dan at aslowerpace dot net

We have enjoyed the redneck jokes for years. It’s time to take a  reflective look at the core beliefs of a culture that values home, family, country, and God.

If I had to stand before a dozen terrorists who threaten my life, I’d choose a half dozen or so rednecks to back me up.  Tire irons, squirrel guns, and grit — that’s what rednecks are made of.  I hope I am one of those. If you feel the same, pass this on to your redneck friends. Ya`ll know who ya are…

You might be a redneck if. . .

• It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase, “One nation, under God.”
• You’ve never protested about seeing the 10 Commandments posted in public places.
• You still say “Christmas” instead of “Winter Festival.”
• You bow your head when someone prays.
• You stand and place your hand over your heart when they play the National Anthem.
• You treat Viet Nam vets with great respect, and always have.
• You’ve never burned an American flag.
• You know what you believe and you aren’t afraid to say so, no matter who is listening.
• You respect your elders and expect your kids to do the same.
• You’d give your last dollar to a friend.

If you got this email from me it is because I believe that you, like me, have just enough Red Neck in you to have the same beliefs as those talked about in this email.

Subject: California

So as not to be outdone by all the redneck, hillbilly, and Texan jokes, you know you’re a Californian if:

1. Your co-worker has 8 body piercing and none are visible.
2. You make over $300,000 and still can’t afford a house.
3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English.
4. Your child’s 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Breeze.
5. You can’t remember . . . is pot illegal?
6. You’ve been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.
7. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown, and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian.
8. You can’t remember . ….is pot illegal?
9. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.
10. A low speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.
11. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.
12. A man gets on the bus in full leather regalia and crotchless chaps, and you don’t even notice.
13. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks’ wearing the baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney, really IS George Clooney.
14. Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.
15. Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber is gay, the woman who delivers you mail is
into S&M and your Mary Kay rep is a guy in drag.
16. You can’t remember . . . . is pot illegal?
17. It’s barely sprinkling rain and there’s a report on every news station: “STORM WATCH.”
18. You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy with the cells or pagers.
19. It’s barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an hour early to avoid all the weather-related s$@# .
20. HEY!!!! Is pot illegal????
21. Both you AND your dog have therapists . . . and lastly,
22. The Terminator is your governor.